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How to flog a dead horse

April 11, 2011
by

Speaking of dead horses, a friend forwarded on this email recently, and it think it’s something that many Geneva locals – indeed, anyone working for or with a large, unwiedly bureaucracy – can identify with:

The tribal wisdom of the Dakota Indians, passed on from generation to generation, says, “When you discover that you are riding a dead horse, the best strategy is to dismount.”

However, in the UN, more advanced strategies are often employed, such as:

1. Buying a stronger whip.

2. Changing riders.

3. Appointing a committee to study the horse.

4. Arranging to visit other countries to see how other cultures ride horses.

5. Lowering the standards so that dead horses can be included.

6. Reclassifying the dead horse as living-impaired.

7. Hiring outside contractors to ride the dead horse.

8. Harnessing several dead horses together to increase speed.

9. Providing additional funding and/or training to increase dead horse’s performance.

10. Doing a productivity study to see if lighter riders would improve the dead horse’s performance.

11. Declaring that as the dead horse does not have to be fed, it is less costly, carries lower overhead and, therefore, contributes substantially more to the bottom line of the economy than do some other horses. A good reason to pass out a huge executive bonus.

12. Rewriting the expected performance requirements for all horses.

And, of course, a UN favourite . . .

13. Promoting the dead horse to a supervisory position.

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